Today, I was a chicken. I didn’t stand by my word… Or maybe the purpose for it was over? I think I gave in, caved in, quit. I couldn’t bear the pain any longer. I had commended myself for it, but then again it looked like foolishness. Maybe the easy way out is what I can take… Maybe I am right… Maybe I would still have to pay… Maybe it’s done… Whatever it is, I know my sun came out the second I got your reply. And I became a thousand tonnes lighter. And I got my strength renewed… Maybe you are good for me after all…
I decided to start over with faith too. Like a child, just like Jesus said. So, I’m gonna hear it all for the very first time. And believe it like it’s never failed. There is something about me and this month…
My friend helped me out with fresh job targets today! Something to look forward to! Should be doing a lot of going out this week. That reminds me, I still need a maga. This purse is… *sigh*
My little nephew’s got malaria. For the first time I supported his mom backing his 3 year old bumbum (kinda weird to use ass for a child, right?). He will be fine.
I’m sure it’s obvious I’m somehow floating above all my messes 😀 I will be home tomorrow to face my music. But I won’t be alone again. I hope the Bank doesn’t come this week. I hope they wait until I’m settled elsewhere. It will be a miracle. I realised that I stopped outrightly asking God for anything cos I stopped believing he’d ever give me anything I ask… But I’m gonna ask again before I sleep. For a job and a new home. And a new name. Just like Job (thank you, mwajim).
I didn’t run after you today. Maybe I’m back to basics now. I sincerely hope so. Would hate to have to miss you like that again. This post is not about you. It’s about me, and how I became a butterfly.