It af tey o

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Mehn, the dust and cobwebs in this joint are enough to fill a city! Once upon a time, writing used to be my healing. For some reason, I just can’t… I think I’m just lazy *insert lazy smiley*

Oh well, I’m gonna try to turn this around. Come here more often. Pick up my stensils and draw more words… Maybe I’d find that place again.

 

Been reading some pretty awesome stuff though. UBetty, TMan, MDania and their crew, Pretty amazing writers. I’m gonna be like them when I grow up. Mwl, I was at Tera on Sunday!!! *insert victory dance* Haven’t been able to go there in years! Kai! Ghosts of hopes of the past! lol! It was good. Really good. So good that I’m going to watch another one this weekend! Yay me!! I saw this hauntingly perfect painting that I swear was done for me. It was a child, little defiant, frightened, determined, cheeky, troubled, scared shitless, scarred, beautiful, precocious little child. Peeking from behind the door/wall. Wondering what doom/freedom lies beyond/coming again? I guess I am that child in many ways. Living in the past and always dreaming about the future. The future is now. It’s here, today. And I’m living it like I’m the child of the past. And I’m not. I’m a woman. Full blown woman. I have to believe this. I need to accept it, need to move on from the past. Else I’ll never live this future, ever. I wish it was easy. Can’t even say I know how. But I believe all my experiences, all my joys, pains, triumphs and trials have led up to this day, the day I started to live. No more holding out for tomorrow. Carpe diem is now a revelation. I have lost too many days, waiting for the day I’d be free. I even got free and didn’t know it! Imagine!

Anyway… I love to learn so this is a new lesson for me. I’m going back to my childhood faiths. I’m gonna live, full time!

kisses

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